Eragon: Chapter Fourteen: A Rider's Blade (Part III)

[pangolin20]

Chapter Fourteen (Part II) | Chapter Fourteen (Part IV)

Kerlois: Welcome back to Eragon, everyone! Last time, Brom confronted Eragon, Saphira was prevented from doing anything, Brom came along with them, and Brom met Saphira. Now for the reader post:

 

On part II of chapter 5:

Ayasugi_San (I think this is good enough; I do not know how you would like to be called) points out that Saphira hunting might indeed be noticed, because the local animals would soon be fleeing her, which someone ought to notice.

Come to think of it, that makes the bit in chapter 12 where Saphira says the buck she caught did not know to “guard against the predators of sky” quite ridiculous. And yes, the buck might be from elsewhere, but would he truly not have noticed Saphira flying around?

This Cannot Be: 34 (+2)

They also note that Saphira’s rapid growth is quite off for a large predator. And it is certainly also inconsistent with dragons being immortal, from which I would predict a very long childhood. Furthermore, as we will see later, dragons’ growth in this setting seems to flatten off considerably after a few years, after which it continues at a pace like that of most reptiles.

All this heavily suggests to me that this rapid growth is due to a spell the elves devised. After all, having a long childhood for the dragons would be disadvantageous, because they would not be able to participate all that fast.

Come to think of it, Saphira learning to speak Eragon’s language within six weeks also seems like such an “adaptation”… though it might have existed before now.

Back on the growth rate, I get the feeling Paolini meant for that to be some kind of “reptile thing”. Too bad that that simply does not go together with immortal dragons. So what he got was what I described above. And of course no one will even notice this is strange in any way.

Look Away: 376 (+20)

Gah, the more I read, the worse the Riders become…

And I should certainly credit Ayasugi for bringing it up in the first place:

“With how dragons apparently only hatch when their chosen rider touches their egg, and then they quickly grow to self-sufficience, it makes them feel... engineered. To be tools for war for humans, no less.”

(I did not make the comparison to Tamed Ones there for nothing.)

Tris notes that sausages would require a considerable amount of effort, so it is quite unlikely that they would be available.

This Cannot Be: 35

Another way in which Carvahall is written as larger than it is, I suppose.

They also point out that it is quite unnecessary for Eragon to go looking for “distinguishing marks”. Indeed. What difference does it make for how he will raise her, after all? And why put this in at all? Why do we care about whether Saphira is male or female (or, author forbid, something else)? Looking back on it, I truly do not like this scene at all.

All The Isms: 8 (not for anything specific, but I do not like the emphasis on knowing her gender at all)

Tris also notes that the contact with Saphira would not be “imprecise” at all. Indeed, if Eragon would bother to learn how Saphira communicates, he might find it considerably easier to communicate. And it would not even have to be telepathic communication! But no, it has nothing to do with him at all.

Best Partners Ever: 190

Finally, they point out that it makes little sense for Eragon to wait a month before going to Brom. Yes, the plot might require it…

But Thou Must: 86

…but it is still quite strange, and I would certainly have preferred that.

Ill Logic: 195

Oh, and Tris also came up with the names “Fauxtagh” and “Thornless” for the Murtagh and Thorn who feature in Murtagh.

On to Chessy.

She notes that Eragon ought to have expected not to find “distinguishing marks” on a reptile. And given that he has had chickens on the farm for quite some years, he truly ought to know this.

Ill Logic: 196

She also notes the growth issue and the issue of how she can possibly eat enough to grow so much. My best guess here is magic. We will see that the dragons can get energy from magic in certain circumstances, so this does not seem all that far-fetched to me.

Further, she notes that the “four-clawed” prints might be coming from her feet, though then I am left wondering why he only cares about half of the prints she leaves.

Ill Logic: 197

She also notes that Saphira making some noise during flying is only to be expected, which is entirely fair.

And she also notes that Eragon could have easily asked Saphira to be petted, be it telepathically or by extending his hand.

Finally, do read her fic here. (It is very nice.)

On part II of chapter 14, Epistler rightfully points out that there is no reason for Brom not to heal his head injury. He certainly would have had the time for it.

Ill Logic: 198

I also have some updates concerning the counts, as I have decided to rename Why Are They So Evil? to Papier-Mâché Villains, which I adapted from the NRSG.

Furthermore, I have decided to adapt these two counts from them, too: Edgy Equals Mature, Right? and ASWLT (Are Supposed We to Like Them). No backpoints for the latter, which will go for general-purpose awful behaviour.

For the former, which will go for all the times that Paolini puts in some “edgy” stuff for no good reason, I would like to hand out two points for how Garrow was described after the Ra’zac tortured him, and one point for the bit with the buck I noted earlier.

Edgy Equals Mature, Right?: 3

The main reason I put this in will become apparent in a few chapters.

 

Now back to the story at hand, and good grief, I have already written a thousand words!

 

Well, when we last left off, Eragon told Brom Saphira’s name, Brom had a quite strong reaction to that (because it was the name of his dragon), and Eragon quickly told Brom that he thinks it fits.

Brom says that it certainly fits. Eragon notes there is something in his voice that he “[cannot] identify”. He wonders if it is “loss, wonder, fear, envy”. Those are some quite specific options for something that you cannot identify, Eragon. Well, going through them, “wonder” definitely makes sense, given that that is what we saw. Fear fits, too, if only because he might be afraid of the Riders failing again. Loss… well, given what we know, that fits, though I wonder if Eragon would note this. And envy… I do not know where Eragon is getting that from, because I certainly am not seeing it.

PPP: 484 (general point for the clumsiness here)

Eragon is not certain, and he notes that it “could have been none of them or all”. Hmmm, I have to say that this scene is handled reasonably well. Yes, you can certainly guess that Brom was a Rider earlier, especially with his speech a bit earlier, but it is not spelled out too much. See, it can be done.

Brom now raises his voice and greets Saphira, saying he is honoured to meet her. He “twist[s] his hand in a strange gesture” and bows. If only he had led with this… (I also recognise the gesture. That is genuinely neat to see!) Saphira then says softly that she likes him. Because of course she is not allowed to hold him threatening her against him.

Sparkly Damsel: 22

Eragon reacts with this:

Of course you do; everyone enjoys flattery.

What a nasty reaction. What is he even trying to say here? That her liking Brom has no worth because she would do it anyway? Also, what flattery? Does he mean Brom saying he is honoured to meet her? That is not “flattery”, it is simply a greeting. So I have literally no idea what he is going on about, only that he is being nasty to Saphira for no reason.

ASWLT: 1

Best Partners Ever: 191

Ill Logic: 200 (+2)

That count hit 200 points already. Quick.

Eragon then touches her and the shoulder and goes over to the house. Saphira and Brom trail along, and we get a note that Brom looks “vibrant and alive”. He climbs into the house and “crawl[s] under a door” into the remains of his room. (How much is left of this house? And no mention of “snow and dirt”?) He says he barely recognises it “under the piles of shattered wood”. Um, are there no shingles from the roof lying in there? I doubt they would have blown away with the wind.

This Cannot Be: 35

And of course we get no reaction from Eragon on seeing his room like this.

Reaction, Please: 73

This would truly be a nice moment for that, but no… Well, he searches for the inside wall and finds his “empty pack”. A part of the frame is broken, but he sees the damage can be easily repaired. The self-published edition notes that he passes it to Brom. Is Brom standing inside of the house, then? How does this work? Well, he keeps rummaging, and eventually pulls out the end of his bow, which is still in its tube. Eragon gets “distressed” at seeing the leather scratched and scuffed. He slides out the bow, “hoping fervently that it [is] not damaged”, which it is not.

The Knopf edition cuts out Eragon’s reactions, and goes right to the bow being unharmed. In both editions, he thinks that he finally has some luck. He strings the bow and pulls on the sinew, which bend smoothly, without any “snaps or creaks”. He is satisfied, and then goes to look for his quiver, which he finds nearby. Many of the arrows are broken. He unstrings the bow and gives it, along with the quiver, to Brom, who I guess is standing just outside of the house? Brom says it “takes a strong arm” to pull the bow, and Eragon “[takes] the compliment” silently.

Is that a compliment? Yes, Brom implies that Eragon has strong arms, but for myself, I am rather thinking “why did Garrow give Eragon such a heavy bow”. Well, Eragon then goes through the rest of the house for “other useful items”, and when he is done, he “dump[s]” it next to Brom. It is apparently “meager”. So… did he not take anything of his collection of curious items along? Not even a broken stone? That is quite sad.

The self-published edition notes that Saphira crouches “a ways from the house” and silently watches them. In both editions, Brom asks “what now?” Eragon notes his eyes are “sharp and inquisitive” and he looks away. He says they will find a place to hide. Brom asks if he has somewhere in mind and Eragon says he has. He wraps all the supplies, outside of his bow, in “a tight bundle” and ties it shut. With what does he wrap it? One of the skins?

PPP: 485

He “[h]eft[s] it onto his back” (how? This is so confusing.), and tells Brom to go “this way”, which is into the forest. The self-published edition notes that the “branches and needles” give the light a greenish cast, which calms Eragon. He says he is in his “natural element”. Might have been nice to expand a bit on that… Well, in both editions, he tells Saphira to follow them in the air, because “[her] footprints are too easily found and tracked”. Not to mention that she would probably get stuck on the way to the hiding place… Come to think of it, why not send her ahead already?

Also, I think this might well be the beginning of a very annoying trend in this series, where the dragons are locked out of action because the other characters need to go into a city/village and they would be too conspicuous. It is not a problem here, but it will soon become noticeable, and it is… quite irritating, to say the least.

Well, Saphira agrees and takes off. Eragon’s destination is nearby, but Eragon “[takes] a circuitous route” to get rid of pursuers (well-thought!). All in all, it takes “well over an hour” before they reach the destination. And here we have another scene that is only present in the self-published edition.

Eragon stops, and Brom looks around and asks what is wrong. Eragon gestures to “a dense blackberry thicket”, saying that this is it. The thicket clings to the trees, “providing a thorny barrier that stretche[s] high above their heads.” Brom frowns and says that he hopes Eragon does not plan to go through it. His beard will catch on the thorns, and “[his] skin will get ripped to shreds”. (How awful.)

Eragon then says that there is a way in. He goes to the edge of the thicket, “[kneels] by a small juniper tree”, and scrapes away “a mound of snow” which reveals a “shallow depression” leading under the thicket. Ooh, this is nice! He says that it will take them inside, but Brom needs to take his pack off and drag it with him. He then drops his “bundle” on the ground himself, and pushes it before him as he goes under the thicket. The tunnel is about “thirty feet” (ten metres) long, and then he is inside.

The Knopf edition just says they stop in “a well-concealed bramble”. I guess they might have used the same method as in the self-published edition? Else it would not make much sense for them to stop in the bramble.

Back to both editions, we are told that the clearing in the bramble is just large enough for “a fire, two people, and a dragon.” (How convenient!) “Red squirrels” scamper into the trees, protesting the intrusion. Brom pulls himself out of the tunnel and looks around the clearing “with interest”. He asks if anyone else knows about this place.

Eragon says no. He found it when “we first moved here”, at which time he would have been about five. Come to think of it, I do not think we ever do find out how old he was when he moved here… Five years does fit with what we have, but would it have been so hard to give a solid date?

Missing Puzzle Pieces: 203

Hmmm, we truly should only give one point per use of this…

Missing Puzzle Pieces: 53

This is better.

Well, he explains that it took him a week to “dig into the center”, and then a week to “clear out all the deadwood”. That does track with him being about five; I would think he would be able to do this in a much shorter time than a week by now. Other than that… I think it might have been a nice escape from the farm for him, to have a place all by himself, away from all his troubles… It is a nice bit of characterisation. Too bad that we never get any elaboration on his childhood.

Also, the bit about him “digging into the centre” is a little bit confusing in the Knopf edition, since we did not see the tunnel there.

PPP: 486

Now Saphira lands next to them, carefully folding her wings “to avoid the thorns”. So what did she do for the past hour? Float above the forest? Again, why did Eragon not tell her to go to the clearing already? If the Ra’zac were still around, they could easily have spotted her!

Ill Logic: 201

She curls up, “snapping twigs with her hard scales”, and puts her head on the ground, and looks at them closely. Which is, unfortunately, what she will be doing for the greater part of this chapter. Also, she is snapping the twigs because of her weight, not because of how hard her scales are.

This Cannot Be: 36

Brom now leans against his staff and stares at Saphira. This makes Eragon somewhat nervous (understandably). In the self-published edition, he thinks that it should not bother him; Brom has been telling stories about dragons for years, but this is the first time he has ever met one.

In both editions, he watches them until “hunger force[s] him to action”. He builds a fire, and then fills “a pot” with snow and puts it over the fire to melt the snow. When the water is hot, he breaks off “chunks of meat” and throws them in the pot with “a lump of salt”. Um, where did the pot and the salt come from? I guess Eragon might have gotten them from the farm, but it would have been nice to have this be clearer.

PPP: 487

He thinks “grimly” that it is not much of a meal, but it will do. He will probably be eating this “for some time to come”, so he might as well accustom himself to it. We are then informed that “[t]he stew” simmers quietly, which brings a “rich aroma” through the clearing. Saphira tastes the air.

When the meat is tender, Brom comes over, and Eragon serves the food. They eat in silence and avoid eye contact. When they are done eating, Brom pulls out his pipe and “[lights] it leisurely”. Finally, Eragon asks why Brom wants to travel with him. Good question! Though we probably will not be getting a straight answer to it.

We first get a note of Brom blowing out smoke, which spirals up and disappears. Then Brom says it is because “[he has] a vested interest in keeping [Eragon] alive”. Because of course he does not explain why he is doing this at once. He is just so irritating to read about! Eragon demands to know what he means, and Brom responds with this:

“To put it bluntly, I’m a storyteller and I happen to think that you will make a fine story.

And Eragon is supposed to want him along? Yes, I know these are not his true motives, if only because he will be training Eragon and such, but it is what he says to him here. It is just so incredibly heartless! If he only cares about keeping Eragon alive because that means his story will continue, then that is not a person Eragon and Saphira should ever want to be around!

ASWLT: 2

Also, why not say something like “since you are a Rider, you are in great danger. I have the means to keep you and Saphira at least partially safe, and to allow you to hunt down the Ra’zac”. That would be much more likely to make him trust you!

Ill Logic: 206 (+5)

Well, he goes on talking, saying that Eragon is the first Rider outside of Galbatorix’s control “for over a hundred years”. I… thought that it was less than a hundred years? Oh, I see we were told earlier that Galbatorix rose to power “over a century ago”… Let me look… Except that some of the later books say it has been less than a century since he came to power.

Going by Eldest, we are told that a celebration that takes place in the year 2700 (in our reckoning), and that takes place every hundred years, was last held in “desperate” circumstances. So that would have been in 2600. The current time in the story is the 22^nd of December, 2798, so a hundred years ago from that would have been 2598/2599… That does fit, but the farther back Galbatorix’s grab for power is supposed to be, the less sense the line about “desperate circumstances” makes.

So let me say that Galbatorix rose to power in the spring of 2599, and that this line and the previous one do not fit. The other lines about it being over a hundred years do work then, since his takeover would be a hundred years ago about halfway through this book.

Forgot Your Own Canon Again?: 90

Manual Patch Job: 62

Outside of this… as I have probably already made clear, I have a very hard time believing absolutely no one managed to evade Galbatorix.

Brom then asks what will happen. Will Eragon “perish as a martyr”? Will he “join the Varden”? Or will he “kill King Galbatorix”? “All fascinating questions”. Only for someone without any sense of tropes, I would say. The answers are, of course, no, yes, and yes.

Taking a closer look, I would like to note that joining the Varden and killing Galbatorix are certainly not mutually exclusive.

Ill Logic: 207

That aside, these are rather leading questions. What if Eragon does not want to do any of this? What if he simply wants to kill the Ra’zac and leave it at that? Will you allow that, Brom?

In the self-published edition, we get a bit more, as he says that whatever happens, “history will remember [Eragon]”. It may be “with vile words or songs of praise”, but his name will live on. In both editions, Brom says he will be there to “see every bit of it, no matter what he [has] to do.”

Well, bold of you to assume that you will not fall pray to Old Mentor Disease. More seriously, good to see that he has apparently decided this without asking Eragon at all. Because clearly seeing what Eragon does is more important than respecting him.

ASWLT: 3

Some Father You Are: 53 (+10) (because traveling with Eragon will be a quite large part of this book)

At this speech, a “knot form[s] in Eragon’s stomach”. He cannot envision himself doing any of the things Brom said, “least of all becoming a martyr”. He thinks that he wants his vengeance, but beyond that, he has no ambition. Understandable (and I am sure the ambition will come eventually).

Then we get this:

S: He set his thoughts aside and said sarcastically, “That may be, but tell me, how can you talk with Saphira?”

K: “That may be, but tell me, how can you talk with Saphira?”

1) How does he say this “sarcastically”? What is there “sarcastic” about the sincere question how he can contact Saphira? Why is he being sarcastic at all? At least the Knopf edition has far less of these moments…

2) How does this follow from what was said? The “that may be” bit seems to mean to me that “why can you talk to Saphira?” stands in contrast to “I will be there to see your story”, but they are not in contrast. It… simply does not flow.

PPP: 487

3) Still, it is good to see that Eragon wants answers from Brom, and that he has picked up on the most suspicious thing about him.

Brom now takes his time putting more “tobacco”/cardus weed in his pipe. Once he has lit his pipe again, he says “if it’s answers you want, it’s answers you’ll get, but they may not be to your liking.”

Blegh, he really rubs me the wrong way. Taking so much time with his pipe for no reason, “if it’s answers you want” as if Eragon’s request is in some way unreasonable, and trying to warn Eragon off by saying he may not like them… Why are we supposed to want to have him on this quest, again?

Well, Brom gets up, brings his pack to the fire, and “pull[s] out a long object wrapped in cloth”. This notably has nothing to do with the question of why he can talk to dragons. Oh, he will came back to it soon, but first he will distract Eragon with something completely irrelevant. Because that is the behaviour we want to see in someone who will join Eragon: when someone asks you something you do not want to answer, you do not tell them, but you distract them so you hope they forget.

ASWLT: 4

Some Father You Are: 54

And yes, this might be because Paolini wanted to show off the titular “Rider’s blade”, but it would have hurt nothing to put that after Brom answering Eragon’s question, so this does come across as Brom manipulating Eragon.

S: It was about five feet long, and from the way he handled it, rather heavy.

K: It was about five feet long and, from the way he handled it, rather heavy.

Revised K: It was about three and a half feet long, and from the way he handled it, rather heavy.

Why, we now have three versions to compare! The difference between the self-published and Knopf editions is only an improved placement of a comma. The revision to the Knopf edition, though, removes 1.5 feet from the sword’s length.

That certainly is an improvement. The old edition has a sword of five feet (1,52 metres), which, from what I see, is quite long for a sword, and would, I imagine, be quite inconvenient to use for Eragon. The new edition has it at 3.5 feet (1,07 metres), which is considerably more reasonable. So congratulations on actually fixing this, Paolini!

What I will not congratulate him, especially since this is in the same sentence as the fix, is Eragon calling the sword “rather heavy”. After all, if a sword is “rather heavy”, it will be no good for using in combat! And we will see this sword be used in combat many times without complaints about its weight, so this is utter nonsense!

This Cannot Be: 37

Brom now peels off the cloth strip by strip, “like a mummy being unswathed”. And that is still a very inappropriate simile to use, as we never hear about mummies in this setting.

Forgot the Narrator: 29

Eragon looks at it, transfixed, as a sword is revealed. What a revelation. Going back to the chapter title… it is still a quite ill fit. Yes, we will be seeing quite a bit of this sword now, maybe more than it warrants, and it will remain throughout the series… but this is also the point that Eragon leaves Carvahall for good. I would think that is the more important bit of this chapter!

Anyway, we get a description of the sword. It has a “gold pommel” that is “teardrop shaped”, and that has its sides cut away, so “a ruby the size of a small egg” is visible. The hilt is wrapped in “silver wire”, which has been burnished so much it gleams “like starlight”. The sheath is “wine red and smooth as glass”, and a “strange black symbol” has been etched into it. Next to the sword, there is “a leather belt with a heavy buckle”. Brom finishes unwrapping the sword and gives it to Eragon.

Eragon notes the handle “fit[s his] hand as if it [has] been made for him.” That is nice. I also note that these paragraphs are quite choppy.

PPP: 488

He draws the sword, which slides out of the sheath soundlessly. The blade is “iridescent red” and shimmers in the firelight. I have no idea how it has been coloured like that, by the way, and we will not learn, either.

Missing Puzzle Pieces: 54

We get a description of how “graceful” it curved, and that the black symbol has also been inscribed on the sword. The balance of the sword is perfect for him, as it feels like “an extension of his arm”, other than the “rude farm tools” he is used to. He says an “air of power” lies over it, as if there is an “unstoppable force” at its core. He says further that it has been made for “the violent convulsions of battle”, and to end people’s lives, “yet it [holds] a terrible beauty.”

Well, after all this description of the sword, Brom speaks up, saying it was once “a Rider’s blade”. And there we have our title. (We will also only learn who the blade was from halfway through this book. Or maybe we should reveal Brom’s backstory earlier, so you can better understand why we judge things the way we do… Let Fumurti do that with chapter 16).

He then uses the generic “he” to talk about Riders, and, since this book also uses singular “they”, I am not feeling charitable.

No-Wave Feminism: 59

Well, he says that when a Rider finished their training, the elves “would present him with a sword.” Hmm, can we get some more information about that tradition? For example, did the Rider undergo some tests first to see what sword would best fit them? And could a Rider refuse the sword, if they preferred to use another weapon? My best guesses are yes, and not exactly (accepting the sword would be the polite thing to do, but using it was not necessary). Also, of course the elves would present the sword, even when there were human Riders.

Brom says their methods of forging have always remained a secret (no longer, people! It is in The Craft of the Japanese Sword!). “However”, the swords are “eternally sharp and will never stain”. These things do not contradict each other.

PPP: 489

That aside, those certainly are good swords! Brom says that the custom was to have the colour of the sword match that of the Rider’s dragon, but he thinks they can make an exception in this case. He explains the sword is named “Zar’roc”, which the self-published edition consistently italicises for some unfathomable reason, and he does not know what it means, “probably something personal to the Rider who owned it.”

Oh, I do know what it means. “Zar’roc” is the ancient language word for “Misery”, something that Brom knows, and that he is lying about for literally no reason! How would it break the persona of “Brom the storyteller” for him to know some words in the ancient language?

Some Father You Are: 55

It is such an unnecessary thing to lie about, and I frankly cannot stand it. Oh, I guess the name of the sword was supposed to stay a mystery until Eldest. Then again, I only care about not spoiling future events in these reviews.

Well, Brom watches Eragon swing Zar’roc. Eragon asks where Brom got it. He “reluctantly” slips the sword back into the sheath, and tries to give it to Brom, but the latter “[makes] no move to take it.”

Brom says it does not matter, and he will only say it took him “a series of nasty and dangerous adventures” to get it. (See? This is how you do it!) He tells Eragon to consider it his, as Eragon has “more of a claim to it” than he does, and he might also need it “before all is done”. Well, that is quite nice of him!

Eragon is caught “off balance” by this. In the self-published edition, he thinks that such swords must certainly be “rare and precious”, and why would Brom give one to him? Because… you might need it, and he wants you to survive? This is certainly not as suspicious as your are making it out to be, Eragon.

In both editions, he says it is “a princely gift”, and thanks Brom. He is unsure of what else to say, so he slides his hand across the sheath and asks what the symbol on it means.

And there I would like to cut off for the moment. Next time, we will have lots of talking. Until then!